Maddie’s journey (In Her Words):
Wow, well today was an epic moment. I bought a beautiful allsaints dress and I can’t tell you how special this has been… I bought a couple of sizes too large and so had to return for a size ten! I am really excited to fit into an allsaints ten and in a non stretchy fabric. This dress is unlike anything I own and ordinarily I wouldn’t have picked it, thinking it would reveal my brace and disability and saying to myself it was “meant for tall thin girls”! I absolutely love it and my feelings have shifted! I’ve tried for years to do this. It’s still a work in progress but I am looking forward to challenging my negative perceptions of me further! However the biggest revelation is: I haven’t looked at my whole body (from neck down) in a mirror in 12 plus years. I haven’t had a full length picture of me taken since my sisters wedding in 2009 and even then I tried to hide behind my bridesmaid’s bouquet.
Today I took a momentous step, and looked at myself fully in the mirror. Today I had my full length picture taken as I wanted to show me off in my dress. I am crying tears of joy as I write this. As the feelings I’ve had about my body are so complex but today I’ve taken such a big step. There are more to be made but I’m trying to worship, nurture and love this body and I’m treating her well! Thank you so much Emily and the team for: educating me, supporting me, encouraging me, getting me to pace myself and realise that rest and relaxation are imperative for life and change. I am severely physically disabled and my physical energy levels are very low but your programme has given me focus (at a really stressful time) and I feel invigorated!
Thank you so much! Love & hugs, Maddie x
